Riding Out the Waves

Riding Out the Waves I'd read the books, I'd consulted the girlfriends, and still, I wasn't expecting morning sickness to be the nightmare it actually was. Sure, the books briefly mention that it could last all day, but who would believe that? Common sense tells you that someone experiencing "morning" sickness all day long is eith er lying, or just terribly unlucky. It's also common knowledge that nearly half of all pregnant women sail through their first trimester completely puke-free, and so I naturally assumed I'd be part of this lucky group. I couldn't have been more wrong if I assumed Vanity Fair wanted me to pose for their cover in all my pregnant glory.

Morning sickness arrived during my fourth week of pregnancy, and I quickly learned that the nausea of morning sickness is not the kind we are all used to -- apparently it's a mutant strain of nausea, impervious to vomiting and time restraints. You could throw up for hours and not feel the slightest bit better; and you could go to sleep feeling queasy, and wake up the next morning just as green-tinged. The nausea of morning sickness was more than just nausea too -- it was an all-encompassing, overwhelming feeling of wanting to crawl into a hole and die, 24 hours a day. I certainly had not expected this.

Before I conceived, I was a nine-hours-a-night girl. I never had insomnia. Never tossed and turned. Sleeping was one of my fortes. I even put it down on my resume under special skills, right next to my ability to say the alphabet backward really fast. But take that nine-hour girl and reduce her sleep time to about half and watch her mentally wither away.

I Can't Sleep

I was exhausted almost every day during my last trimester. My body was so weary after a day of schlepping itself around that it was in desperate need of forty winks. What with that incredible heartburn, Braxton Hicks, and a bla dder the size of a kumquat, it made it difficult to fall off to slumberland. In addition, my baby seemed to have kick-boxing lessons through the night. And once the lesson was over, she’d hiccup for hours like a drunken sailor. Add up all these factors, and I was up half the night…if I was lucky.

I can offer a bit of advice to help you go off to la-la land. First off, surround yourself with pillows. They actually make a pregnancy pillow that’s long enough to encircle your entire body. You can get these in stores, in catalogues, or on the internet. If you don’t want to make the investment, use several different pillows from around the house. Be sure to swipe your husband’s pillow as well. Misery really does like company. Place these pillows anywhere you need support. I would suggest putting one pillow under your belly, one between your legs and a couple behind your back. Although this will give you relief from some of your aches and pains, it will give your husband very little room left on the mattress (which may actually be one more way to ease the resentment you feel from having to carry the baby all by yourself).